Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Facts of Life

Current Mood: achey and slightly recalcitrant

Current Song: The Hardest Part by Coldplay

So, I was just sitting around and thought that there are some facts to life that exist that we almost never acknowledge and yet they fall soooo true. Here are some of them (No, not those facts of life. grow up. you're not in grade 2 anymore).

1. Intellectual Snobs hate other intellectual snobs: It's true. When you meet someone who has an air of defiant know-it-allness, you immediately don't take to them. Which for me, is odd because I'm one of them. We completely have this double-standard for ourselves. Intellectual snobs here defined as people who generally shun the bourgeois, know the name of at least one fancy cheese (camembert, check), often have a smug self-righteous look on their face (check) and didn't have to check up "recalcitrant". Oh how I love my fellow snobs!

2. Whether you like it or not, you end up turning into your mother. This is very true. Just look at me! I'm nearly there. And people comment on it all the time. i think we've been living together for too long...time to move out!

3. God generally opens a door for you to walk through, and then stands around the corner with his foot out to trip you. Just when everything goes right, everything goes wrong. Isn't that the truth? I find it very irritating that fate likes to muck about with my grand plan. Sure keeps me on my toes!

4. They all come out of the woodwork when you're at your worst. I have one bad hair day and suddenly the cutest guy on the skytrain starts to flirt with me. I go to the grocery store with sweatpants on and the guy at the counter chats me up. I don't understand the twisted logic. All I know is, I wish there would be more bad hair days.

5. Most of us wish we could be Oprah's dog: That dog has got to have the sweetest life. Doing nothing, living in a big house, having everyone run about doing things for you. Sure, you might want to be Oprah too, but she actually has to work, and I'm not so fond of that prospect. What a great life to have....

Anyway, I best be off. Things to do, people to annoy. See you all in a few days!