Friday, April 13, 2007

Giving Birth is Like Taking your Lower Lip and Forcing It Over Your Head

(above quote: Carol Burnett)

Current Mood: General apathy

Current Song: Good things by Nelly Furtado

So yesterday was "the mom's" birthday. We got her a present, and she managed to ruin her own surprise by finding out where we had hidden her birthday cinammon bun. Oh well, her funeral. We are taking her out for dinner tomorrow. Hopefully she doesn't ruin that for herself too.

For the next week, I plan to talk about the various aspects of my life, as I lead up to my 25th. I have been reflecting a lot, looking at my skin age, noting my choice of wording, reminiscing about past happenings and future endeavours. Today's topic: the mom cult.
I watched a new comedy show yesterday called "notes from the underbelly". It's about a bunch of couples who are preparing to have their babies and the various shenanigans ensue as a result thereof. There is one single friend, who has the exact demeanour of...me! I love when i can peg people who are like me.

The mommy cult seems to be growing amongst my generation already. I'm not sure how many people are now new moms. They have that ultra glow on their faces as they gaze down at some wrinkly surly thing that they are going to love, and possibly deal with all of their lives. i can't say that i might enjoy that kind of experience. Just last week, there was that huggies advert on TV with that little girl who is playing teaparty with her dad. I watched with the same emotional outburst I would have if I was watching a car tire advert. Then i turned to my mother and said, "Is it okay if I say I don't like that kid?". She replied that she didn't like her either. Whew! Perhaps one day I might think of adopting (BC has the largest population of unadopted children in foster care in all of Canada. i will think of it as my one good deed in this world to give some child a good home...because we all know that other than that, I'm going straight to hell).
For those who are moms, bless your hearts, I hope your children grow up to be upstanding citizens of this world. Not those spaghetti throwing, screaming ankle biters that some people end up having. For now, I'm going to abstain from joining any kind of mommy cult in the future. I have other things to do. if you see a mommy parade one day, i'm the one in the back drinking a martini and paging through a vogue magazine.

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